this cunning linguist

I'll be a park, and thou shalt be my deer;
Feed where thou wilt, on mountain or in dale:
Graze on my lips, and if those hills be dry,
Stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie.

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currently listening to:
"to know you"by gift of gab
1982 self titled album

a story by brother dave

A while back I was in Los Angeles visiting my friend who went to USC. USC is situated just south of the Shrine Auditorium where they used to have the Academy Awards. Well, it just so happened I went to visit him on that Academy Award weekend. Needless to say, the streets were fuckin' packed with no where to park due to all the fans, media, and whatnot.

With a bunch of my homeboys piled into my rental car, we drove around for about 40 minutes looking for a spot to park at just outside of his apartment complex. Finally I see three brothas piling into a suburban getting ready to leave. Thankful, I pulled up behind them, hit my blinker (indicating that I was going to take up the spot) and waited.

For 10 minutes, those three cats fiddled around in their suburban doing something. I got impatient and stuck my head out the window. "Hey dog, you guys leaving?" I see a hand pop out the window giving me a hold-on-just-a-sec hand signal.

Two minutes later "DOG! You guys dippin out? We're gonna take that spot," I ask again.
An annoyed voice answers back from the drivers seat, "Yeah were leavin. Hold up."

Five Minutes later, I'm pissed. I lay on the horn with an annoying BRAAAAAAAAAP

"Hey Nigga! You getting out of that spot or what?"

Out pops Keenan Thompson from the driver seat, and shouts "Nigga I said Yeah!!!!"

He looks at our carload of hoods and hesitates.

One of my homeboys pipes up from the back seat, "Hey man! You're Kel from Nickelodeon! Whats up Kel!"

Keenan gets this confused look on his face, "But Im Keenan-"

The same homeboy pipes up again cutting him off, "Whatever cocksucker fucken beat it!"

Keenan with a destroyed look on his face, hops in his car, and peels off.

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currently reading:
inicidents in the life of a slave girl
by harriet jacobs

10 TRUTHS BLACK AND HISPANIC PEOPLE KNOW,
BUT WHITE PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT

1. Elvis is dead.
2. Jesus was not white.
3. Rap music is here to stay.
4. Kissing your pet is not cute or clean.
5. Skinny does not equal sexy.
6. Thomas Jefferson had black children.
7. A 5 year old child is too big for a stroller.
8. N'SYNC will never hold a candle to the Jackson 5.
9. An occasional BUTT whooping helps a child stay in line.10. Having your children curse you out in public is not normal.

10 TRUTHS WHITE AND BLACK PEOPLE KNOW,
BUT HISPANIC PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:

1. Hickey's are not attractive.
2. Chicken is food, not a roommate.
3. Jesus is not a name for your son.
4. Your country's flag is not a car decoration.
5. Maria is a name but not for every daughter.
6. Jump out and run is not in any insurance policies.
7. 10 people to a car is considered too many.
8. Buttoning just the top button of your shirt is a bad fashion statement.
9. Mami and Papi can't possibly be the nickname of every person in yourfamily.
10. Letting your children run wildly through the store is not normal.

10 TRUTHS WHITE AND HISPANIC PEOPLE KNOW,
BUT BLACK PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:

1. O.J. did it.2. Tupac is dead.
3. Teeth should not be decorated.
4. Weddings should start on time.
5. Your pastor doesn't know everything..
6. Jesse Jackson will never be President.
7. RED is not a Kool Aid flavor, it's a color.
8. Church does not require expensive clothes.
9. Crown Royal bags are meant to be thrown away.
10. Your rims and sound system should not be worth more than your car.

with thanks to sauldiego.

Girls make you come.
Grown women make you come home