linds

advice to L
my homegirl wrote me for some advice, she is practically in the closet gay, with little sexual experience, and a girl likes her. i thought i gave good words, but i wonder if she got anything from it, or maybe i offended her...
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The girl:
These Phones Are Evil So Wasnt Sure If U Rec My Last Txt To U...i Find Very Few
People That I Like And Want To Get Close To But With U I Find Myself Wanting To
Do Both. Its A Nice Feeling For Me But Kinda Scarey Too. I Dont Want To Make A
Fool Of Myself Three But I Would Like To Get To Know U Better That Is If U Feel
The Same Way. As U Said Once I Could Go On But I Think I Said Enough Already
Lol..talk To You Soon:-)

My friend:
Hi, How would you make a fool of yourself? I do feel the same way... But I don't
want you to change your life or anything crazy for me... I would like you to do
haven't been able to do for awhile and get to know yourself again.

The girl:
Im So Glad U Feel The Same Way..im Awful At Guessing And When I Do Sometimes
Thats When I Make A Fool Of Myself. As For Changing My Life I Do That For Me. I
Dont Want To Waste Anymore Time On Someone Who Doesnt Really Care And Who Takes
All The Fun Out Of Life And Who Makes Me Feel There Is Nothing To Look Forward
To. But The Other Reason I Want Away Is Because Of You..when I Thought U Were
Going To Go Away It Made Me So Sad And I Didnt Realize Until Then How Much I
Care For You. I Am Going To Change My Life Three And I Want A Chance To Have You In It. And I Do Not Need To Get To Know Myself. I Spend 24/7 With Me And Know Me
Like No Other And Im Bored And Lonely Of My Own Company Lol. Do I Have A Chance
With You Maybe? If I Do I Dont Want To Blow It. You Are One Of A Kind Three And
Im So Lucky To Have Met You My Life Is So Much Better Because Of You. If I Could
I Would Try To Make Yours Better Too. Sorry Sooo Long I Could Write A Book. I
Stop Now My Face Is Burning Red.. :-

My friend (This time forwarding the emails and writing to me)
Ok now you know I'm freaking out!!! Am I allowed to ask just what this "relationship" would entail? Help...

My response:well, theres an awful lot i dont know about this situation so i dont know how much i can help... but i think i can say one thing, ____: dont over anaylize things. this person likes you and wants to get to know you, thats it. yeah, thier email is a bit much, but i dont think its abnormal, when you like somebody, you tend to say too much at first sometimes, especially if youre young/inexperienced, and especially when your communicating via chat/text message, you tend to drop your guard. this person likes you, dont question WHY. and dont do your usual and pretend that you dont care at all. this sounds like someone who wants to get to knw you, so let them a little, and see if you like them. just hang out. have dinner, tea, movie, whatever. spend the night watching cartoons, just hang out with someone a little bit and allow yourself to enjoy it. youre going to meet a lot of people (already have, actually) attracted to you, thinking about you on an "other than friendship" level, its going to keep happening, and you've always seemed (and still are?) uncomfortable about it. tho i think i know, really i can only guess as to your reasons why... but holmes, the people around you know that you are fun and cute and cool to hang out with. you gots to know that, too.

i dont know how many youve had, but i think youve had at least two (____, ____, and maybe me sometimes) parasite relationships, friends who werent really, who hung out with you b/c they were the beneficiary of the relationship, felt they looked good standing next to you, felt better about themselves while with you and not in that "this person inspires me to be my best" way. you dont have to be with people like that. you dont have to settle. youre better than that, you dont deserve it. you dont have to be uncomfortable, its your life, be the person you want to be, the person we see you as, FUN, CHILL CUTE _____. i think youve spent so much time being uncomfortable that you now you just kind of always are uncomfortable. girl, keep popping that paxil and enjoy!

---shannon (your homie hopped up on welbutrin)

My Friends Response:
That advice was very helpful and I appreciate being able to see how others see me. Thank you